i don't like sucking hair
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
