and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Randomize
