doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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