i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
