Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
