he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
