We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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