Im at strip club and am horny
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
