In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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