I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
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