Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Just invented taco cereal.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
