k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
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