so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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