Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
