she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
