He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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