mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
