Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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