Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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