so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
