I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
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