pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Be still, my beating vagina.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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