i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
