dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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