there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
