It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
