I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
