I'm really into asian looking animals
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Randomize
