I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize