Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
