Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
