Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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