Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Randomize