he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
The Olympian is in my bed
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize