Sry I called you an 8
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You ate ashes out of my bong
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
