I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Life is so much better after having sex.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
