Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
