why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
