tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
