: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
