you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
