eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
