I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
