If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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