I molested 6 butterflies tonight
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
