I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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