I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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