So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
