I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
