that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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